Camera Lights Action!!!!

Movies are my thing too and I do a lot of them, and a lot more. Some of my favourite characters in movies include, wait a minute am a movie critique so I will go straight to the highlights of all the movies I have watched.

The Dark Knight is the best movie of all time and so is Heath Ledger the best villain of all time. In this amazing movie Heath Ledger has a lot of memorable lines but these three stand out:

I believe whatever doesn’t kill you simply makes you stranger

Why so serious?

Nobody panics when things go according to the plan, even if the plan is horrifying……introduce a little anarchy, upset the established order and everything becomes chaos.

And so I say God rest his soul in eternal peace. Steve Carell in the comedy, Dinner for schmucks quotes John Lennon who wrote:  you may say am a dreamer but am not the only one. And the use of this line in the movie gives it so much sense than I ever imagined it possessed.  Steve Carell steals the sh

ow again when he says at the dinner,” Vincent van Gool everyone told him “you only have one year, you cannot be a great artist”, you know what he said, “I cant hear you”, Vincent van Gool was a dreamer

In the animation Legend of the Guardians, Eglatine says “Da says our dreams are who we are” and Da,their father, says, “Just because you can’t see something doesn’t mean that it isn’t real…”

In another of Zack Snyder’s classics, 300. in reply to Stelios dying comment, “it is an honour to die by your side” Gerald Butler says “it is an honour to have lived at yours.”

Another of my favourite movie lines is from Fired up and is used by both Eric Christian Olsen and Nicholas D’Agosto although the credit for this line goes to the latter it is the formers usage of it at the cheerleading camp final competition in a bid to convince Sarah Roemer and the rest of the team to do the impossible move; fountain of troy that makes it worth its salt. He says, “you gotta risk it to get the biscuit”

In the adaption of Erin Gruwell’s freedom writers, Hillary Swank says, “ …by the time you are defending a kid in court the battle is already lost. I think the real fighting should happen here, in the classroom”. In the same movie Miep Gies, who hid Anna frank (Author of the Diary of Anna Frank) when called a hero says, “ oh no no, young man no, I am not a hero, I did what I had to do because it was the right thing to do, that’s all. We are ordinary people, but even an ordinary…. Teenager can within their own ways turn on a small light in a dark room.” In the same movie, Erin Gruwell’s Dad tells her, “what you have done with those kids, I don’t even have words for it but one thing is for sure you are an amazing teacher…… and I envy that, and I admire you and how many father’s have to say that to their daughter’s and really mean it.”

In a 2007 drama classic, August Rush, Jonathan Rhys Meyers tells Freddie Highmore, “You never quit on your music no matter what happen because any time something bad happens to you it’s the one place you can escape to and just psst let it go.”

I’m bound to award the greatest line of all movies to the 2003 spy thriller film the Recruit when Al Pacino tells Colin Farrel, “our failures are known, our victories are not


come ‘ on smile

this is my best

Go easy on life. Don’t frown your way through the day. Give a smile for even that which you feign could make somebody’s day.

return to sender

Dear Lovi,

I understand the weirdness of having to contact you using words that comes not from the mouth rather from the drops of ink. Nothing shames me that my cowardice at not being able to face you. I know I have always mentioned myself brave but today I choose to hide behind the paper. I choose so that I could be able to speak my mind without fear of consequences.

I have been planning how to put the words of this letter but no way seems worthy. It is true you were the best girlfriend I have had in a long time. You were not the epitome of miss right, you were better. Better because you are real and not simply an idea carefully planted into my head. You smile was tangible on the stretches it marked on your face. Your tears were real and made me feel bad for being such an unappreciative boyfriend. Your physique was real complete with boobs, booty and beauty. Your cleavage stretched down the length of your blouse and that too was real. Your words were real especially when they scorned me for the wrongs I had done. You were so real my dear and I am glad I shared your world.

I know I walked away without saying goodbye and for that am guilty. Am guilty of the results of our next meeting or of the time we bump into each other on the street. And so I swallowed my pride and wrote this letter. Even though you are tempted to think I did this because I know too well that malice cannot fly, lying dogs do not thrive and rotten eggs do not fry I would have tried to pursued you to think differently but I suspect your are right.

I want to apologise for the way I treated you. How I showed you what a princess you were before I had you and what a frog you became once you were mine. You can hit the paper whole day but let me finish. I wish to tell you that such treatment was unavoidable. Whoever told you men are vultures should have told you they are scavengers. It is not that I was a bad boy, it is just that I wasn’t the good boy for you and for that am sorry. Am sorry for asking you to do weird stuff to me so that I could shoot a video and share on Facebook. I apologise for introducing you as my cousin the many times I did. I am sorry for seeking blame in your actions so that I could break up with you. I am sincerely sorry for sleeping with all of your friends and even your aunt. I am sorry for calling you beautiful when you were not. I am truly sorry for making you laugh just so that I could get you to allow me into your bed. I don’t want to stand out as the ideal guy after our incomplete break up but I want to man up and own my actions.

If we meet in another life please look at me like another stranger who just wants to take you to bed. I would love to let you do the nasty things you did to me as long as we don’t go back to us. Being the good person you are I am sure you will accept my apologies and that when you meet a hot friend of yours you won’t hesitate to hook us up.

I hope that does it.Bye


Your ex

Caption this

Today I read a poem, a powerfully written piece

The kind I’d say I’ve never read before

Interesting and overwhelming reading it is

For the words speak passion and much more

In ways I know not


So I took a pen and paper and gave life to this

Am not as great as he is but my best I bet

Occasionally hitting the nail and often I do miss

but I won’t put it down till my want is met

till that elusive skill is got


I ponder how to some lines come with ease

Yet to others weird is all earned in their grope

Words can be woven to speak volumes of piss

Other times mediocrity they dexterously rope

In them lessons are taught


As wild as imagination grows unto bliss

Mine led me to a place I’d call a tavern

Where whores and gentlemen hug n kiss

Call it hell but I shall call it just another heaven

About it my pen wrote


I sat on a stool and with looks gave her a tease

She walked to me and said that was rude

“ooh really” I said frantically holding her knees

She stared at the hand saying” 50 to get me nude”

And there was all I sought


She dragged me out before I could say yes

So I clutched my trouser to guard my wallet

My heart reluctant to jump on another mess

for empty pockets never bought me a pallet

but in chain I was already caught


holding my hand she led me to the benches

kissing, half hugging she ripped off my shirt

once again amazed at the skill of these wenches

I pulled her up as my clothes fell to the dirt

As her boobs my palms sought


My breath gave away her taste of cheese

her lips moved through my neck down my chest hair

I felt weak as her palms climbed my knees

My member stood when her hands almost got there

Waking from its hair lot


And then she stopped midway and asked for her fees

I jerked and my hands held her close and tight

And whispered in her ear “wait till we end this piece”

She looked at me amazed and said till I pay it aint right

And that is all I ever got


And so as my pen slowly went dry of ink

To a world of reality my disappointment sank

and once again I asked myself why I don’t drink

for then I would’ve something to blame the wank

but an answer I got not





Dear Journal

Dear journal, it has been long since we last talked, but I hope you will understand we agreed we talk only in times when I have findings not observations. Anyway am sorry for being rude so how are you? I hope you haven’t told anybody my secrets yet and that you will never stop listening to me. You are my greatest friend, you know, even though we both know am not good at favourites that as well I might have said that to all the people I met so far.

Back to business, I know you want to kill me for the length of time I have kept mum, the times I have pretended you don’t exist and lived life without you. I must confess that though I call somebody else my best friend, you truly are my best friend. You don’t victimise me, forget the mistakes I commit and listen to me full time. As much as I believe you know am such a talker I would like to remind you that I’m writing not talking and that you are hell of a listener. Ok! Ok! Ok! I know you want to know about her and everything but please let it come at my own time. Damn you! I can no longer think straight it looks like I would have to tell you about her after all.

I met her when I went to visit my cousin in KU. Forgive my poor start of the story and allow me to start again. She walked in quite unnoticed and started saying hi to her friends, all this time unnoticed by mr Brightside here. I didn’t for a second think her great ass had any beautiful effects on her face. After all I’ve already told you about great asses making lousy faces. Then she turned and walked at me and there it was, she was smiling, yeah she was smiling at me. So being the gentleman I was I carefully avoided her face and looked straight at her bum to show her the kind of ass hole I am. I prayed she noticed this, later she confessed she didn’t. I continued talking to one of my cousin’s pals as her hand stretched out to great my mate. I looked up into her face and there fell into the gaze of her sparkling eyes. Her face was oval or say the shape of the outline of the egg,  her skin was light and moist. It looked soft and it went tender down her neck towards the bust of her chest and down her cleavage. Her hair was medium and clipped at the back. She didn’t use any fancy styles on it yet it still shone inside the poorly lit room. Her breasts just barely visible at the seems of her top bulged slightly out of their cup shaped bra (she must have had one). Her scent was sweet real sweet. In a summary of this verbosity she was so pretty with every piece of flesh properly placed. She wasn’t skinny, neither was she plump and you couldn’t even say she was medium. She was a little below the medium category into a new classification I’d rather call apotene (come’on don’t look that up). She was the kind of chick that as much as you got tempted to tell how beautiful she was you zipped up for the fear of the punishment of the gods for using such an understatement. On earth she was an angel and in heaven probably a goddess. She looked good from all dimensions. Her chin was sweet and her lips quite delicious. She did no make up and still put the most beautiful woman to shame. Her smile aggravated the situation as it sent shivers down my spine, I wish I would have said through the centre of my brain.

I believe she was God’s prototype for angels but failed because of her smile; surely God couldn’t use her especially for delivering bad news. Who would appreciate bad news coming from a smiling face. Anyway back to her she looked more delicious that am convinced that the gods and goddesses of beauty created death in order to bring her reign to an end. She was the kind of lady no man could dare believe answered calls of nature. She looked well kept and smelt better than any fragrance known to man. I know you are thinking am brainwashed, keep that thought because it is so similar to what I thought when I looked myself in the mirror soon after I saw her.

“Hi, are you okay?”

That’s when I realised that time wasn’t frozen when I had my day dream. She really must have heard everything that just went through my mind because her smile faded a little and her eyes sparkled less. She was still the most beautiful woman known to man and wild imaginations passed through my head when I finally managed to taker her hand and shake it for the 5 mins I did, if at all the stories are true. I don’t remember if I spoke back to her but when I tried to get back to the conversation I was in I couldn’t rem her name and her physique remained imprinted into my mind. Her voice was smooth and sweet, it sounded like it was more like she spoke straight into my head. I excused myself and walked to the bathroom, washed my face and looked myself in the mirror. I pointed at the man in the mirror and told him things I can’t remember.

Surely bad things happens to good people for here was the probably best person in the world smitten by the worst man alive. My gaze followed her very move. I could see her chest lift up when she breathed and her chin bulge whenever she smiled, which was like always. She had sat down to update her pal about her weekend. I must have stared for long for my cousin shook me out of my stupor and when I looked up everybody was smiling. When I walked in this room earlier I was the inconspicuous man who sat down to chit chat with old pals but here I was the centre of attention. I don’t know whether she liked the stare or not but she was now smiling at me. My heart stopped, literally and I froze in my swing motions designed to release tension from a tough situation. Her gaze was still fixed at me when my cousin whispered into my ear that I should go and talk to her.

To be continued

Dare forget the lines

I find books to be so intriguing and am bound to say most of the lines I want to remember comes from them. I’m not good with favorites so I might be tempted to call each line that comes alive as my favorite, with that I duly apologize.
One line that I would curse myself if I dare forget is from Lord of the rings, arguably the greatest fantasy novel of all time and written by J. R. R. Tolkien. in Bilbo Baggin’s birthday speech is one of the greatest lines ever writ:
Today is my one hundred and eleventh birthday… Alas, eleventy-one years if far too short a time to live among such excellent and admirable Hobbits. I don’t know half of you half as well as I would like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
But JRR Tolkien might be the king of fantasy but he’s not the only king, Dr. Philip McGraw is also a king of amazing lines. Though I might not be able to quote unquote him as I did above because this next line was used as a title of a chapter in his outstanding book: life strategies. He says, once you chose an action you chose the consequences.i don’t have half his wisdom but surely this line has meant a lot to me since I read it.
Shakespeare too is a ruler of lines and under his autocratic rule words bow down in ways that awe the sons and daughters of lesser gods, as JRR Tolkien calls us. In his masterpiece Merchant of Venice, many of us folks from the chocolate city have been victim of the effects of plagiarism when others quote Shakespeare’s character Prince of Morocco, who had come to take the casket test in a bid too woo Portia said the most romantic thing from the vanilla empire : mislike me not for my complexion …
Ben Carson in his famous work Gifted hands speaks so highly of his mom in one quote. He says his mum kept saying to him, “ you can do anything anyone else can do, only you can do it better”
Forgive me for include the controversial lines of Malcolm Gladwell in his book outliers, he states that there is always something in the lives of great achievers who make them who they are, their lives was characterized with certain opportunities that they took up and shaped them to who they become. So never hope to be them if you don’t fall under similar circumstances.
even after all this magical lines and great quotes from men who have shaped the world of reader’s and navigated the universe of writers, I have to give credit to the winner of the best lines when it comes to books I’ve read: John Mason in his classic the impossible is possible wrote keep your temper to yourself nobody else needs it so for all those who feel mad at me for skipping their favorite lines from this installment take a cue from John Mason or rather hit me up with a mail and I will sure include it on the next installment of this column.